Unveiling the Journey from Shame to Empowerment

Uncover the incredible stories of how Bret Lyon and Sheila Rubin transformed their own experiences of shame into a treatment method sure so improve the lives of many.
Written by Bruna P.
Bret and Sheila


Shame, a powerful emotion that can often weigh heavily on one’s psyche, is a complex aspect of the human experience. How do individuals cope with this formidable feeling? In the following article, we delve into the transformative journey of Bret and Sheila who not only conquered their own struggles with shame but also shared their insights with the world.

Bret and Sheila’s story began with their own personal battles against shame, stemming from distinct yet equally profound sources. As they navigated the tumultuous waters of childhood and adolescence, they encountered this emotion in various forms, shaped by the unique circumstances of their families’ issues. However, rather than succumbing to the paralyzing grip of shame, they wanted to understand it and share their experiences.

Bret and Sheila will join us again soon with more events, don’t miss out! You can find out more in their free webinar available on our website on the 13th April find out more.

Bret and Sheila’s journey

Through introspection and a relentless pursuit of knowledge, Bret and Sheila developed methods to navigate the intricate feeling of shame. Their journey of self-discovery led them to become experts in the field, armed with a deep understanding of the nuances of shame and its impact on individuals’ lives. Drawing from their own experiences and insights, Bret and Sheila crafted a holistic approach to addressing shame, blending their distinct perspectives into a cohesive framework. This fusion of two divergent paths not only enriched their understanding of shame but also paved the way for a comprehensive methodology that transcends boundaries.

What is “shame”?

“Shame is both a primary emotion and a freeze state”, that is present in personal development and in relationships but it’s still yet to be recognised by many cultures and psychotherapists.

It is perhaps one of the most painful emotions and it hides behind other emotions such as anger and fear making it hard to detect. Some people have difficulties in perceiving this emotion and it becomes harder to make progress in the therapy.

Shame can even be viewed as a developmental trauma as it causes the same physical and mental freezing- it becomes hard to think when people are in this state. Therefore, shame and trauma combine with each other creating a strong wall that’s hard to break.

Shame in therapy: easy or hard to deal with?

Bret and Sheila have identified one of the most challenging aspects of therapy sessions: many clients find it relatively simple to ignore or deny their problems, yet struggle immensely when it comes to confronting and addressing them head-on. Recognizing this hurdle, both therapists and clients alike require comprehensive education and training on the intricacies of shame – understanding its origins, mechanisms, and impacts.

Throughout their experience, Bret and Sheila have noticed the necessity for therapists to be equipped with effective tools and strategies to guide their clients into awareness of their shame. They have therefore developed the right models of work for therapists which include practical frameworks to facilitate the meaningful exploration of shame.

Tips for therapists

By focusing on education, training, and the development of effective therapeutic models, Bret and Sheila aim to empower therapists to better support their clients in navigating the challenges posed by shame. Their other goal is to foster a more empathetic and effective therapeutic environment where individuals can confront and overcome shame, leading to greater personal growth and healing.

Bret and Sheila’s education program aims to help therapists show their clients how to recognise shame through the following steps:

  • Becoming more sensitive to the shaming often implicit in their situation and learning how to counter shame in therapy.
  • Helping clients separate feelings of shame from other emotions.
  • Learning how to take clients back to early shaming situations and reverse the outcome.
  • Supporting clients to move their energy powerfully outward rather than turn it against themselves.

Do not miss the main event!

We are offering an exclusive one hour training session with Bret and Sheila for free! Click here for all the info.  We will also be providing you with the opportunity to read articles and gain some background information on their work so keep an eye out for additional information.

Bret and Sheila will be revisiting Psychotherapy Courses again later in the year to delve into their therapeutic methods in greater depth and examine the significant influence of shame on our lives. Dates are TBC so be sure to subscribe for timely updates to stay informed.

We hope to see you in April – book your spot here! 

Written by Bruna P.
March 12, 2024
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